Sunday Mercury's Jonny Dangerous tackles world's hottest pizza

Jun 21 2009 by Jonny Greatrex, Sunday Mercury

As if the mystery meat was not enough, more napalm-like ingredients were liberally sprinkled on including green chilli peppers and extra spicy arrabiatta sauce.

After six minutes in the oven I was ready for battle to commence as Pino delivered my meal, complete with an ‘emergency’ pint of milk to cool my mouth down.

Remembering my failure against Sarnie Schwarzenegger, caused by too much exertion in the early rounds, I began slowly.

I gingerly chewed the first mouthful, fearful of an explosion of fire on my poor defenceless tastebuds.

But nothing happened.

Then I put another, bigger, chunk in, tearing at the dough with my teeth.

Still nothing happened.

So I reverted to my usual eating speed of supersonic and stuffed the rest of the slice in.

I had dramatically over-estimated my opponent. This was not a lightweight with a powerful punch, but more like a featherweight with a weak jab.

Soon I was tucking slice after slice away until, just minutes later, the plate was empty and I had succeeded in my challenge.

Once a brooding Pino had cleared my table – upset that I’d dispatched my Italian opponent with such ease – he came trotting over carrying a second pizza.

“Jonny, we have a special prize for anyone who eats the calabria like you have,” he said, before taking aim and splatting a freshly-made margarita straight into my face.

With tomato sauce dripping from my nose, I realised I had learned a valuable lesson – never mess with an Italian’s meaty sausage.