Sunday Mercury Diva tackles Jonny Dangerous and his lack of fashion sense

May 3 2009 By Jonny Dangerous

AS I stood outside the towering entrance of the Merry Hill Shopping Centre I felt my palms turn slippery with sweat.

This was not my natural habitat.

Scared and confused I had to push on if I was going to succeed in my next challenge – meeting a Diva to revamp the Dangerous wardrobe. And it is definitely a clothing collection painfully in need of freshening up.

I arrived for my latest task wearing my only pair of trainers which are entering their third year and still – in my opinion – going strong.

And I was wearing the older of my two pairs of blue jeans, which were purchased in November 2003 with my first student loan cheque.

On my top half I had a T-shirt which I borrowed from a friend for a night out and never managed to give back, combined with a green woolly jumper which I seem to sport in every picture taken of me in the last five years.

But this was all to change when Diva got her hands on me.

True to her high-fashion image she pulled no punches as I dutifully followed her round with a bemused look on my face.

With razor-sharp dress-sense she rifled through rail upon rail of shirts, jeans and sweaters.

Every few minutes another coat hanger would be added to my already overburdened fingers.

When I tried to lighten my load I was quickly reprimanded by a terse Diva retort: “How can I possibly create a look for you if you leave half the clothes at the other ended of the shop?” she said.