Lockley: Malc's love poem agony

Jun 23 2008

MALCOLM, the 50-year-old bachelor who still lives with his mother, is besotted with that blonde up the road who runs the pony club.

Sadly, his rock-bottom self-esteem means she's totally oblivious to the raging passion Malc's struggling to keep at bay.

He believes, with some justification, he's got no chance.

"I've written a poem about her," Malc confided over a frothing pint of best bitter at The Drum and Monkey.

"It goes, 'Beautiful lady on a horse, I see you pass by.

"'Beautiful lady on a horse, will you catch my eye?

"'Beautiful lady on a horse, you don't like me very much, do you?'"

It's got a certain raw honesty.