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David Hasselhoff outstays his welcome

IS there some kind of TV law that David Hasselhoff has to be booked on to every entertainment and quiz show?Read

Mary Portas needs to design clothes for real women

HTHE penny dropped during Mary Portas: Queen Of Frocks when she suddenly said: “I’m not a designer. I can’t do this.”Read

Samantha Cameron doesn't need a new outfit just a better haircut

HSHE’S no Kate Moss, but fashionistas have been getting their Victoria’s Secret knickers in a twist over Samantha Cameron’s wardrobe at the Tory Party Conference this week.Read

Jodie Marsh's new look is bicep-curlingly awful

SHE was the lads’ mag favourite who courted the paparazzi in a succession of barely-there outfits.Read

Nostalgia: Crackerjack (1955-1984)

CRACKERJACKRead

Another grisly Midsomer murder

THIS is the sort of ghoulishly quirky death we’ve come to expect in Midsomer – a tax inspector turns up dead in a vat of cider.Read

I Spy a great new comedy

EVERYONE is spying tonight! Espionage is hot stuff at the moment in the cinema, with the films Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, The Debt and Johnny English Reborn.Read

Coronation Street spoilers from October 10

THINGS go from bad to worse for Carla when Frank hits back with his secret weapon – his mother.Read

Emmerdale spoilers from October 10

THERE’S lots of forbidden kissing in the village this week, with Cain and Charity, and Marlon and Laurel, locking lips. Neither is very surprising. We knew the vicar’s wife was being led into temptation by the chef, and they finally snog, but then she still insists she won’t cheat on Ashley.Read

EastEnders spoilers from October 10

WE suspected, when Amira left the Square patting her stomach and smiling, that she would one day return holding a baby.Read

Helen Mirren explains why she feels permanently guilty

HDAME Helen Mirren may be 66, but she’s still full of energy, as she shows as a martial arts-fighting secret agent in The Debt.Read

Dream houses on Grand Designs - but what's the cost?

HMORE TV envy this week came when I watched Grand Designs. I want to live in the spectacular house in Tenby, converted from an RNLI lifeboat hut right on the beach.Read

Bake Off is so British

HI NOW have a new favourite TV job to aspire to. I want to be part of the production crew on The Great British Bake Off, because surely they must descend on the amazing cakes and pastries when filming finishes. The products look so delicious, they must all be the size of houses.Read

Jennifer Aniston and Liz Hurley's matching men friends

IT IS a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.Read

Only Way Is Essex star Mark Wright's fallout with Lauren Goodger continues

HWITH his smug smile and penchant for flashing his pecs, it can be hard to feel anything towards Mark Wright other than deep dislike.Read

Alan Carr - Spexy Beast at Birmingham's NIA

BRITAIN’S campest comedian warned us not to expect too much from his latest comedy show, as he hasn’t toured for four years.Read

Merlin's audience grows up

A FOURTH series of the hit BBC1 series Merlin can only mean one thing.Read

EastEnders spoilers from October 3

THERE are more confrontations between Ben, Phil and Patrick before the lad finally bites the bullet and tells his dad that he’s gay. You can imagine that this goes down like a lead balloon. Will Phil ever accept him?Read

Emmerdale spoilers from October 3

OH, just get on with it, Laurel and Marlon! They are clearly made for each other, but the scriptwriters want to drag out the ‘will they, won’t they’ storyline a bit longer. The friends lean in for a kiss this week but just as their lips are about to touch, they pull away.Read

Coronation Street spoilers from October 3

STEVE McDonald pulls some wonderful faces in Corrie, but Deirdre and Tracy are giving him a run for his money this week.Read

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